1970’s called, they want their manual traffic census back. Puh-lease.

12 Apr

Peoples of the world, I came across this today.

1st of all, wtf is a manual traffic census in this day and age. And why is it been done in the middle of the only motorway in the city in peak hour traffic. Yes fine, that’s when they want the census for, I get it. But really, manually!? (For those not in the know, peak hour traffic is around 2pm, when work finishes, for some). Enough said.

So I decided to break it down for myself aaaaaaiiiiit.

Traffic: Vehicles moving on a road or public highway

  • – a stream of heavy traffic

Ok fine. Get it. We’re not muppets around here.

Census: An official count or survey of a population, typically recording various details of individuals

  • – population estimates extrapolated from the 1981 census
  • census data

Again, not rocket science. Just stick with me here.

Traffic census: No exact match found for your search ‘traffic census’.

Suggest or Ask for translation/definition

Other suggestions : traffic calming, traffic circle, traffic cone, traffic jam

See, even Google doesn’t have it it’s so old school.

Fine, not really:

1.       roads count of passing motorists: a count of the total number of motor vehicles using a street or road at particular times, used for traffic management purposes. The count can be done manually or electrically.
U.K. term  traffic census

Now this is my point, I am not trying to act totally stooopid. But it’s the 21st century. This traffic census should be done electronically, surely? Seriously people, 1970’s called, they want their manual traffic census back. I’ve never experienced a manual traffic census in my life. It should not be an excuse to have a get together with your mates on the side of the road. Just look at the picture… gathering of peeps, cooldrink stand having a lekker jol and a fat chat and causing chaos and a mahoosive traffic jam because everyone wants to see what’s going on. Chaos my peaches, chaos.

This is what you’re looking for. Spelt out – EEE-LEC-TRO-NIC. Is that not so much easier!?

And yes according to your sign, your census is SLOW. Very damn slow. You said it. Bleh, I have nothing more on this. No more.

Over and out.

Miss M x



4 Responses to “1970’s called, they want their manual traffic census back. Puh-lease.”

  1. The oil money in his pocket April 13, 2011 at 11:22 am #

    You see, the feds are investing all their $$$ in providing free money to the lovely youth of the country.

    Forget all this modernity for sometime to come.

  2. Matt April 13, 2011 at 11:58 am #

    The actual census was being done on the traffic coming from the service road, joining the main highway, not the main highway itself. The reason that the traffic was so bad is because everyone either panics when they see a police car (putting down their phones, putting on seatbelts, getting kids off their laps, etc) or slows down to rubberneck (stare at what is going on) not driving sensibly forward and thus allowing traffic to proceed as per normal. It is these muppets that cause the problems but I have to admit there are better ways to do it (but not if you actually want to ask the drivers questions rather than just count vehicles).

  3. ynotoman April 13, 2011 at 7:09 pm #

    and of course it sloooooows traffic in both directions
    – hope it was the passenger taking the picture
    – and so many people doing it
    – dont they have click counters?

    • Miss M April 18, 2011 at 9:43 am #

      Defo slows it in both directions! Ha ha. It was most certainly the passenger taking the piccie. I think they may had click counters – was too much chaos to even see what was going on.

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