1980’s phoned

18 Jan

So this evening I’m standing in the checkout que, or till as we like to call it in Saffa land, at the supermarket. Waiting my turn patiently, I was staring deep into the cover of Viva magazine (stunning cover Natalie Portman – we like), I was day dreaming of “so-hot shoes, dresses that dazzle”, as the cover lured me in – I was suddenly rudely interrupted as something caught my eye, something horrifying.

 A padded alice band.

O.M.G (pronounced oh – em – jee). Do they even make these anymore? You know, the one’s that stand about 5 cm’s off your head. I thought to myself, well at least she’s not wearing a scrunchie. And then, there it was… an emerald green velvet scrunchie too! On her wrist! Um… excuse me lady, 1980’s phoned and wants their padded alice band AND scrunchie back. Yusses.

My eyes drifted over to check her “married lady ring finger” because surely no self respecting man would be caught dead next to a padded alice banded, scrunching wearing freak. No ring, I was right. And just like that she was gone – thank GAWD. I never even caught her face, or what she was wearing.  There was just too much going on in my head right at this moment in time.

I quickly stopped in at the Pharmacy to stock up on Berocca for these recent late nights at work. There she was again – please make her STOP! She was biaaatching to the lovely pharmacist about the difference between 100g and 300g asprin. OH MY HAT! Take the stronger drugs lady! This went on for 15 minutes, fact. Instead of buying asprin lady, how about you buy a can of shut the fak up so we can all get a move on here. And hey lady, while you buying your can, take your padded alice band and your scrunchie home where you will no longer be an absolute eye-sore to society. Please lady! Puh-lease.

I have no more words on this devastating experience. Nothing.

Miss M x


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